The Little Prince Part 2

Chapter 21

Actual text:

« Je cherche des amis. Qu’est-ce que signifie “apprivoiser” ? » Dit le petit prince. « C’est une chose trop oubliée, dit le renard. Ça signifie “créer des liens”…  »

Translation:

“I am looking for friends. What does that mean - tame?" "It is an act too often neglected," said the fox. "It means to establish ties."

Firstly, a short summary for those of you who have never read the book (you should, it's less than 100 pages).

As the prince cries after finding out that his rose is just one of thousands other roses, a fox appears. The little prince wants to play with the fox but the fox says first the prince has to tame him. When tamed, they will need each other, and become unique and special to each other. Through rites and rituals, the little prince finally tames the fox. However soon the time came for the prince to go and the fox says he will weep. When the prince explains that it’s the fox’s fault for insisting they become friends, the fox says that he knows and that it has all been worthwhile because he can now appreciate the wheat fields (the prince has golden hair like the wheat fields). At the garden, the prince realises that even though his rose is not a unique flower, she is unique to him because he has cared for her and loved her. The prince then said goodbye to the fox and the fox leaves him with a secret (quoted below).

“. . . One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes. . . . It’s the time that you spent on your rose that makes your rose so important. . . . You become responsible for what you’ve tamed. You’re responsible for your rose. . . .” – fox

In order to make this chapter seem clearer, I would first like to clarify the word “tame” used here. There are 2 French words for the word “tame”. One is “domestiquer”(to domesticate) and the other is “apprivoiser” In the little prince, “apprivoiser” is used instead. An example of the word “apprivoiser” would be like the following: “Il faut apprivoiser cet enfant” or in English: we must “tame” this child. “Tame” in this context is different from what we traditionally believe it to be. It is less of making someone subservient, and more about creating an emotional connection and establishing ties, more reciprocal without the idea of mastery and domination. With this in mind, the moral behind this chapter will make more sense.

 As we can see from the little prince’s time with the fox and time with his rose, to be “tamed” or to “tame”, requires some form of sacrifice. The little prince devoted his time through rites and rituals in order to “tame” the fox. As for his rose, he cared for her and loved her, again sacrificing time and effort. The lesson here is that for us to create a connection with another person or some object, we have to sacrifice some part of ourselves. It can be time, or love, or even money. But after we have given that something up, the person or object becomes more connected to us, and thus more valuable and precious to us. Also with this connection, it makes the person or object unique and special to us. 

“Men have forgotten this truth,” said the fox. “But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your rose…”

With this relationship formed, there should naturally be a sense of responsibility created. We have a kind of power over the people we “tame”, and this gives us the ability to cause pain. The closer we are to the person, the more power we have over him or her, and the easier it is to hurt him/her with our words or actions, either on purpose or not. With great power comes great responsibility, and we should always remember this power to hold over somebody we love. The rose didn't know the power she held over the little prince, and hurt him unintentionally, causing him to leave his planet.

The fox also teaches that the essential things in life are invisible. He is speaking about love here, and that the little prince should look not with his eyes but with his heart. Love itself cannot be physically seen, but felt and experienced. For the little prince, his rose looks the same as all the other thousands of roses in the garden, but his rose is unique to him, because he feels the love he has for her. And it is this love that is the most important in life.

When the prince finally left the fox, the fox wept. There will be a time when we have to leave the person or the thing we treasure, that we have a connection to. That is the unavoidable fact of life. We feel sad because we are losing someone or something that possess a small part of ourselves. First we sacrifice something in order to establish the ties, and when we say goodbye, that little part of us is lost forever. Why would we want to make sacrifices in order to be hurt in the future? 

When we spend quality and meaningful time with a person we have establish a connection with, a person we love, we create strong memories. Looking back at these memories of the time together makes all the pain of saying goodbye worth it. The fox will be reminded of the little prince when he looks at the wheat field, and he will be happy thinking back on their time together. This scenario happens to every single one of us. When we establish a true and deep connection with somebody, we will be hurt when goodbyes have to be made. However this bond will remain with us for the rest of our lives, including the memories that we have. It is bond is love, the most essential thing in life. 

The chapter also reminds us to treasure what time we have with the people we love. This time will end someday, and there are no exceptions for anybody.

I feel that this chapter is the deepest and most meaningful one in the entire book. It says so much of love that we tend to forget or sweep aside. Below is one of my favourite quote.

“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” – A.A.Milne, Winne-the-Pooh

If we do not have a connection with somebody, saying goodbye will be painless and easy. But the "relationship" will be meaningless. When saying goodbye is difficult, you know you have something precious in your life.